Sexual intercourse in pregnancy in the first, second and third trimester: yes and no.
Is it possible to have sex during pregnancy and if so up to what month? What is allowed and what is forbidden? Are there any recommended positions? In this article we answer all the most common questions and doubts about pregnant sex.
Sex in pregnancy can undergo major changes. On the one hand, the fear can arise , both on the part of the future mother and the future father, of hurting the child or compromising the course of the pregnancy.
On the other hand, the woman undergoes major physical changes that can make her feel less desired. In addition, the hormonal changes that occur during pregnancy can cause a decrease in desire or, conversely, an increase in libido .
First, it is important to emphasize that fears of hurting the baby are unfounded . Unless there are threats of abortion in progress or particular problems highlighted by the gynecologist, sexual intercourse can continue throughout the nine months of gestation . Indeed, making love during pregnancy is good not only for the woman (and therefore indirectly also for the child), but also for the understanding between the future parents.
A healthy sexual activity allows in fact to maintain that indispensable bodily communication in the couple and to favor a relaxed and serene climate . All this will allow you to better face a challenging period such as the one following the birth of the child.
Can you have sex while pregnant?
In most cases, the answer is yes.
In fact, there are NO contraindications to sexual activity during pregnancy IF it is physiological, i.e. low-risk . We are talking about situations in which there is a history of placental abruption or previous miscarriages, placenta previa, a risk of premature labor or rupture of the membranes, abnormal vaginal bleeding or sexually transmitted diseases (herpes, syphilis, gonorrhea, etc.) .
Unfortunately, however, there is an endless list of misconceptions about sex in pregnancy , which despite having no foundation are often the cause of unnecessary anxiety and worry. Below we list some of them.
- Masturbating is dangerous: FALSE
- Having sex while pregnant can cause loss of the baby: FALSE
- Orgasm can trigger labor and lead to miscarriage: FALSE
- The penis hits the baby’s head during intercourse: FALSE
- Sexual intercourse can harm the fetus: FALSE
- Penetration can infect the child: FALSE
- The fetus hears and understands what is happening: FALSE
Remember that the baby is well protected inside the amniotic sac and immersed in liquid inside the uterus. In addition, the cervix is closed by the so-called mucous plug.
That said, of course, pregnancy sex still requires some caution. In fact, sexual intercourse must be conducted gently and avoiding putting pressure on the belly .
Contractions after intercourse in pregnancy: are they normal?
During or after sexual intercourse during pregnancy, it may happen that you feel irregular, painless and short-lived contractions caused by the oxytocin released during orgasm.
These contractions are not dangerous, cannot cause premature birth and do not harm the baby . On the contrary, they strengthen the uterine muscles and prepare it for childbirth.
To make them pass more quickly, simply change position or walk. However, if the contractions do not resolve within two hours or become intense and painful , it is important to contact your gynecologist .
Sex in pregnancy: why is it good?
Making love during pregnancy is not only possible, but it is even recommended. In fact, sexual activity has numerous benefits for the health of the mother, the child and the couple:
- burns calories, counteracting excessive weight gain , stimulates circulation , increasing the flow of oxygen to the placenta, and reduces blood pressure ;
- improves mood, giving a pleasant feeling of well-being and relaxation that is also communicated to the future baby;
- it helps to get rid of negative tensions and to sleep better , also thanks to the oxytocin which is released during orgasm;
- strengthens the couple’s understanding and can help to face pregnancy in a more serene way;
- it helps the expectant mother to regain confidence in her femininity and to improve her relationship with her body (which undergoes great changes during pregnancy);
- strengthens the pelvic muscles , facilitating childbirth and promoting faster post-partum recovery;
- it can help start labor (after the 38th week), thanks to the prostaglandins contained in the seminal fluid and the uterine contractions associated with the female orgasm.
Frequency of sexual intercourse in pregnancy
Of course, each couple is free to have sex as often as they wish. According to some studies, however, regular sexual activity (at least every 1 or 2 weeks) is associated with a lower risk of preterm birth .
Sex in pregnancy: when is it forbidden?
Despite all the benefits of pregnant sexual activity, there are some cases where intercourse is not recommended. In general, sex during pregnancy is contraindicated in case of:
- previous miscarriage or premature birth;
- threatened miscarriage or risk of preterm birth (but only when the problem occurs and not as prevention);
- vaginal bleeding;
- abnormal vaginal discharge;
- current sexually transmitted infections;
- excessive dilation or shortening of the cervix;
- placenta previa;
- premature rupture of membranes.
If your gynecologist recommends abstaining from intercourse, have it clearly explained which sexual activities are prohibited or permitted in your specific case (for example, only full intercourse or all practices that can lead to orgasm).
The recommended positions and those to avoid
Generally, after the first trimester of pregnancy it is suggested to avoid the supine position (the so-called missionary position), because the partner could cause pressure on the abdomen of the expectant mother.
A comfortable position is instead the spoon position , where the woman turns her back to her partner and is curled up on her side, or the one on her knees , with the man lying under the partner.
Of course, ours are just suggestions. Each couple is free to choose the position in which they feel most comfortable: experimenting is nice!
A separate discussion is that of anal sex in pregnancy . This practice, in fact, is often not recommended while pregnant, because it could favor or aggravate the onset of hemorrhoids and increase the risk of transmission of bacteria from the rectum to the vagina.
Sexual intercourse in the first trimester of pregnancy
In the absence of specific medical contraindications, intercourse can be had without any fear in the first months of pregnancy.
On the other hand, starting from the first weeks of gestation , the expectant mother may have a drop in sexual interest and libido, due to the presence of disturbances such as nausea, tiredness, general malaise, unstable mood and sore breasts.
In the first trimester of pregnancy, the woman generally feels the need to be reassured and pampered , rather than the desire to have complete intercourse. Many mothers-to-be, however, may experience heightened sexual arousal during this time .
This happens thanks to hormones which, while on the one hand can cause nausea and tiredness, on the other hand are responsible for smoother skin, shinier hair, firmer breasts… all factors that make women feel more beautiful and in harmony with their body!
As for sex in the first trimester, here’s some advice for future dads : be careful not to compress your partner’s breasts too much , which can be very sensitive and painful in the first three months! Even the stimulation of the nipples could be annoying or painful, so try to be delicate and possibly ask your partner if she likes this practice.
Sexual intercourse in the second trimester of pregnancy
The second trimester of pregnancy is usually a phase of physical and psychological well-being .
The expectant mother is starting to feel better, she is less tired and feels more active. The first months, which are generally the most difficult and at greatest risk of miscarriage, have passed, and the visits have confirmed that everything is fine. This newfound feeling of well-being and tranquility positively influences sexual desire during pregnancy , which could suddenly increase again.
The belly is not bulky yet and allows for some freedom in terms of sexual positions. Hormones, on the other hand, cause more blood to flow to the pelvic area, which can make female orgasms more intense and frequent during intercourse.
Another aspect not to be underestimated is that the man could be very attracted by the new curves of his woman and this could further favor an increase in sexual relations.
In parallel, however, the vaginal walls may not lubricate easily. Furthermore, the genital mucous membranes could be more sensitive and for this reason a gentler penetration is also recommended .
Sexual intercourse in the third trimester of pregnancy
Sex during pregnancy in the third trimester is often characterized by a decrease in female desire , due to the presence of testosterone but also due to the feeling of fatigue, back pain, tiredness, insomnia and possible fears related to childbirth.
In addition, the baby bump is starting to feel bulky and this, together with the weight gain, could make the expectant mother feel less desirable.
In the last months of pregnancy it is advisable to avoid any kind of pressure on the abdomen . Accordingly, appropriate positions should be adopted, such as those lying on the side (with the man behind the woman). One of the couples’ favorite positions is the one that sees the man lying down and the woman kneeling above him, but from behind: this way the penetration isn’t too deep and allows you to stimulate the famous G-spot.
In any case, be careful in the last weeks of pregnancy because the uterus sinks and the penis could touch the neck of the uterus during penetration, causing small bleeding . In this case, to be safe, the advice is to suspend relations and contact the gynecologist or midwife.
Sex in pregnancy: advice from the midwife
During pregnancy, if the couple doesn’t want (or can’t) have a complete sexual act, they can safely limit themselves to masturbation and oral or manual stimulation . And of course green light to kisses , hugs , massages and pampering !
In fact, it is good to remember that sex is not synonymous with penetration and that there are different ways to keep intimacy and eroticism alive within a couple.
Another fundamental ingredient for a serene pregnancy sex life is dialogue . In fact, expecting a child brings with it many physical and psychological changes, which imply the need to find a new balance between partners.
Talking frankly about your feelings, doubts and fears will avoid the risk of misunderstandings and help you better understand each other’s needs , easing tension and allowing you to find a new dimension of sexual intimacy together.
Kathryn Barlow is an OB/GYN doctor, which is the medical specialty that deals with the care of women's reproductive health, including pregnancy and childbirth.
Obstetricians provide care to women during pregnancy, labor, and delivery, while gynecologists focus on the health of the female reproductive system, including the ovaries, uterus, vagina, and breasts. OB/GYN doctors are trained to provide medical and surgical care for a wide range of conditions related to women's reproductive health.