Have I read “The defective ones: wanting a child at all costs can be addictive”?

Le defective, a largely autobiographical novel by Eleonora Mazzoni, is a book that, for those who frequent the forums of women looking for a pregnancy, will certainly be familiar.

In it there are feelings, expectations, emotions, desires but also the same terms used by all those who have been looking for a child for some time.

It narrates the vicissitudes of Carla who, on the threshold of 40, is an established woman but with a great emptiness inside her: she is unable to have a child. Thus begins the difficult path of PMA, the addiction to forums, the swing of joy and despair that follows the failure of the fertility treatments to which she undergoes.

the child who does not arrive has become the only thought of the day, the only pulsating activity which, like a woodworm, empties the rest, interests, passions, commitments from within, leaving the casing to safeguard social life and presentability

In parallel with this search for a child, Carla tries to find her place not only as a mother but also as a daughter, emphasizing the importance of having her own inner balance, which in turn allows you to accept your limits.

In “I hate all delays. Except one” sums up the stubbornness of this woman who shamelessly highlights her weaknesses making them strengths to re-emerge.

There are some very important figures for Carla who accompany her and guide her in her choices: Seneca and her grandmother Rina, strong and fragile at the same time, almost an emblem of the female figure.

Although the topics covered are strong and moving at the same time, the author has managed to find a balance with the irony and delicacy with which she faces the avalanche of feelings and “tortures” that a woman who cannot become a mother has to face.

And so one page makes you cry, the next makes you smile.

It is a book full of emotions that I recommend to all women and beyond.

Why did I read it? To get even closer to those who write to me and who generally only tell me the “medical” part of their journey. I found many similarities between Carla’s story and the testimonies I read and receive every day. An army of many Carlas who need to express what they live in the depths of their hearts.